There’s this great story in Luke 8 of Jesus and his rag-tag bunch of followers. Right after he calms a storm, and once again reminds them he isn’t their average Rabbi, they sail to the other side of the Sea of Galilee and dock the boat close to a lakeside village. There they meet a man who is possessed by a demon and living among the graves. We don’t know how long he has been there but you can imagine his appearance. Barely dressed, his body battered, and bruised. Broken chains hanging from his hands and feet. His hair long and matted, pain and desperation etched across his face. When I imagine him speaking, it’s deliberate and terrifying. The voices that answer are void of life yet powerful and full of hate. A chill runs down the back of all those who listen. All those, except one. The One who consistently rebelled against the worldview and would eventually die so that even this mess before him could live. The man begs Jesus for mercy. The disciples must have been leery. A few minutes ago, Jesus was calming a storm; now a new kind of storm stood before them. You can picture their wide-eyedness as they follow Jesus closely, watching, and wondering what he will do next.
Of all the times in the life of Jesus, I rarely find myself hanging out beside the manger admiring the beautiful baby. Of course, there are times I do but it’s usually in December within the glow of the Christmas lights. I tend to bypass the mountainside and the cross, too. Instead, I spend way too much time in the grave. Like the man in Luke 8, darkness lures me into those places and I willingly grab a coffee and go.
I seriously doubt the man who was healed in the graves ever returned to reminiscence. Why would he? Jesus had freed him and given him a purpose, “Go and tell what God has done for you.” So powerful. So beautiful. So final. So why do I keep returning to the grave?
I wake in the middle of the night worried about how I will accomplish my schedule. I want to be a servant but get aggravated when someone treats me like one. I’m worn out with empire and church politics. I just want God’s people to not be jerks and try to love others. I tend to focus on the disappointment and disillusionment and, too often, become jaded and totally forget my purpose of going and telling what God has done for me. And every time I complain, I take myself right back to the grave. Nobody has to lead me there. I know the way very well. I’ve worn a beaten path to the grave. My entire life seems to consist of looking up and realizing I’ve walked right back into that familiar place once again.
Every time we draw lines of fellowship to tell someone they’re not worthy of the love of God, we’re doing it from the grave. Every time we lose friends or influence over opinions or traditions, we’re doing it from the grave. Every time we slander a peer, we’re doing it from the grave. Every time we refuse to welcome the outcast or love an enemy, we’re standing in the grave. Every time we swear allegiance to anyone or anything other than Jesus, we are doing it from the grave. Anytime we allow fear to dictate our behavior, we’re doing it from the grave. Anytime we think our salvation will come from a political party, or anytime we aren’t trying to keep our minds set on Christ, we are grave walking.
Every day, Jesus has to remind me that he has set me free from this. And that. And that other thing, too. Every. Day. I blame it on my schedule or my Enneagram number. Or my ADHD brain but the truth is, I keep walking back to a place that is comfortable. And every day, Jesus has to walk in and lead me out. My version of Jesus has him sighing and shaking his head a bit while he does it. He gets me.
We don’t come up with fear, jealousy, deceit, lust, and gossip on our own. We had to go to the grave to pick up those things. They reside where the dead things are and we don’t belong there.
Jesus freed the man from his demon possession and he freed him from the grave, as well. He’ll do the same with us. Jesus can free us from our jealousy. He can free us from our bigotry. He can free us from racism and ignorance. He can free us from legalism and lust. If we will only keep ourselves out of the grave.